I will eventually get back to quilting and update you, whomever might be interested, on the progress of the baby quilt for my brand new neice. Right now, I have a lot going on in my life. While quilting may help ease some stress, I have found that I just do not have the patience for it. I need my mind to be active, engaged, and, at times, distracted. Quilting does none of those things for me. Usually, when I’m quilting or doing some other task that doesn’t require much of my active attention, that’s when my mind wanders and I can think about things. I would rather not think right now. When I start thinking about everything that is going on, I get stressed out. When I get stressed out I get cranky. And eventually, depressed. I just do not want to go there right now. Luckily, I have some amazing friends who have helped keep my spirits high and my attitude out of the ditch. If they are reading this, they know who they are and I can’t thank them enough for caring about me the way they do. They keep me sane without even realizing it and I couldn’t live without them. Ok, a couple of them do realize it lol.
So while I’m sitting here avoiding contemplating my inner thoughts and feelings, I’ll explore more fun things to think about. Like some recent confessions, or rather, observations about myself, that I have made. I will share them with you, too, my dear readers, because I have no shame, apparently.
- I can’t dance. Cannot. I’m all white. I have no rhythm or skills in this area but I still dance like nobody is watching and enjoy every second of it. That’s what life is about, right?
- I am a great driver. No really, I am! *snort* I have only had one wreck that was my fault and I ran into a barbed wire fence. That hardly counts as a wreck! Really! And just because I can’t find my way out of a parking lot, or back up straight, or parallel park doesn’t mean that I can’t drive. I backed over a lawn mower one time because I couldn’t see it. It shouldn’t have been parked behind my van. Totally not my fault. Curbs just shouldn’t be in some places. I’m not the only one that runs over them, come on. Just because I do not have good depth perception and have run my side mirrors into the mailbox and stuff doesn’t make me a bad driver either. Yall agree with me, right?
- I have no sense of direction. None. See the above statement about finding my way out of a parking lot. It should also be noted that if I turn more than twice, I’m practically lost. I cannot remember where I came from or where I’ve been. I need landmarks when given directions. Telling me to turn North on such-and-such street will only confuse me. Tell me to look for the big white house with red shutters and turn right, towards some other object. I will feel reassured that I’m actually going in the right direction. Now, when trying to find my way back, I’m still going to be totally lost. GPS is the BEST invention EVER! However, it does not help one find a way out of a parking lot. I figured that out recently as well. My van has a built-in compass and I’m telling you, that doesn’t even help me. This is why I will not go hiking alone. I would be lost, crying and pitiful. I would probably only be about 100 yards from civilization, but I would never figure that out because I would have NO idea where I was. Totally not kidding.
- I am slightly ADD. I do not have a professional diagnosis on this or anything, but that’s just gotta be it. I can’t sit still for very long. I’ve gotten up numerous times while trying to write this blog, actually. It’s difficult for me to sit through a movie at home. My mind and my body want to be active. I will keep getting up and doing things. I have been known to play a game or mess around on the computer while watching a movie because I feel like I need to be doing something. In the movie theater, the movie tends to hold my attention, though. Unless it’s really long and really boring. Then I’m sitting there DYING. I’ll cross and un-cross my legs, reposition myself in the seat, turn around and check out the crowd behind me… I’m like a toddler when I get bored during a movie. I’m one more boring scene away from making faces at people for entertainment. I am able, miraculously, to pay attention and be still during my 4-hour-long classes. They hold my attention, most of the time, because I am there to learn and I’m fascinated by my chosen field. If I was in something boring, like, oh, English Comp. 101, for example, I would have a very hard time paying attention or staying focused. I find my mind wandering at the most inappropriate times, too. It’s not that I’m bored! I just can’t help it. I sometimes miss what a friend has said to me and have to ask them to repeat it because I’ve gotten distracted by something. Or I will give them a polite “uh huh” out of habit and they know I’m not paying attention because that wasn’t an appropriate response. Bless their hearts though, my friends just understand that I’m “not right.”
- I’m just weird about some things. I have too many quirks to list here. If I did, you people would think I’m psycho, I’m sure. Just know that I have strange ways when it comes to certain things. Like my personal space, for example. I can feel a couple of my friends rolling their eyes right now because they know exactly what I’m talking about. I will freak out in a crowd. Too many people in close proximity to me makes me crazy. Really. That’s just one example. I’ll leave it at that.
- I have a twisted sense of humor. I find humor in things that most people wouldn’t think are funny. I laugh at myself quicker than anyone else I know. Along the same lines, I am a smartass. I was born a smartass, I will die a smartass. It’s who I am. If a twisted sense of humor and smartass wit offend you, then you would not like to be around me. I’ve always said that you either love me and laugh with me or I offend the hell out of you. There seems to be no grey area. I’m ok with that. I’ve found that the people who are offended by me are mostly people who do not have a sense of humor. I can, and do, censor myself at appropriate times, don’t worry. When I’m in a relaxed environment, around friends, and especially when I’m drinking adult beverages, however, my filter is turned off and there is no telling what you’re likely to hear come out of my mouth. You’ve been warned.
- About that censoring thing: I still can’t get away with anything. I am very expressive without even trying. People who know me well will tell you that I don’t have to say a word. Whatever I’m thinking will be written all over my face. My friends find this quite entertaining, let me tell ya. I will keep my mouth shut in an attempt to be polite, but my true feelings are reflected in the expression on my face. I do not do this on purpose. I can’t help it. I’ve even tried to have a blank expression. It’s just not possible for me. I would be the worst poker player on the planet. People have burst out laughing at me before because of a look on my face that I wasn’t even aware I was making. For this reason, I do not lie. What’s the point? I can’t get away with it. Nevermind that I’m going to forget I told a lie and then eventually tell on myself later, anyway. That is, if I was successful at fooling someone in the first place.
Ok, that’s enough confessions from The Crazy Lady for one day! If you didn’t know me before, maybe this helps you understand the person behind the blog just a bit more. Or you may just stop reading my blog because you think I’m psycho. Either way, confession (and reflection) are good for the soul and ego. Just when you think you’re awesome (which I totally am, by the way), take a step back and list some of your quirks or faults. Humble yourself. And don’t forget to laugh about it.